I wanna...

I WANNA MARRY HIM!!!

That's exactly what popped up in my head while I was working with someone lovely. And it's my very first time to get such feeling in my entire life! Oh dear! What's happened to me?

I've heard or read somewhere that the word "marriage" flashes on when some have met her/his love of their life. But I didn't believe such thing just because the particular sensation had never been sprung in my mind... before I saw my Mr Darcy sometime ago. (Obviously 'Mr Darcy' is not his real name but you know what I mean by that name if you've read Jane Austen's "Pride & Prejudice" ;))

I've known him for some years and he's just someone I sometimes work with. Is he my friend? Yes, probably... but he's not like other friends of mine whom I often hang out with. I don't know much about him except what he does for living and how seriously he cares about his work. Anyway, that weird inspiration gave me goosebumps! What I did at the exact moment was... looking at him in profile and listening to him talking to someone else. Nothing dramatic happened, really. Just that 'I wanna marry him' phrase came to me so naturally out of nowhere... very odd!

Unpredictable things happen when you expect nothing, right? I assume there's something my life tries to tell me but will know what it really means much much later. In fact, he's been one of my favorite people since I met him for the first time. Hey, you would never want to marry or get to know someone unless you like that person, you know.

One of my female friends told me to do something about it immediately. She is a feminine type of girl who longs to depend on her partner for a living. Me? I'm totally opposite to her who likes to consider work and partner separately. And I like to see how things develop from here without any forced attempt. Nothing good would come out of swimming against the natural stream. Life flows the way it's meant to be and being flexible is always important for me.

I think I've finally got to the point where I can change my way of life (meaning work and place to live) easily. That indeed frees me from all the unnecessary persistencies that I used to have when I was younger. Much less self-centered, so to speak. It took me 40 some years to learn that! Whew, my life seems to have more surprises in store!! Hey my life, I'm expecting you to keep doing a good job for me!  Count on you, darling!! :D